What is Normal?

Mum - Can you do my washing?

We live an unusual life with Cameron. He is almost 25 years old but we care for him just like a toddler. We watch over him 24 hours a day, taking care of all his needs, thinking for him and providing for him. If we can't physically be there for him then we have to ensure somebody else is. 

Cameron's day to day life is not what you would expect a 24 year olds to be. There is generally no paid work or study, no mates or girlfriends, no date nights or driving, no high jinks or responsibility. So when he does something that is normal it often takes me by surprise. 

This week we have been staying in a hotel while My Little Angel takes part in a dance competition. Cameron has been having a little holiday at the property next door with his support worker. Cameron had some washing and we have a washer and dryer in our accommodation so Cameron brought me his washing. Cameron's never ending washing is just a fact of life at home but in this situation it struck me as funny and normal. Young men will often take their washing home for Mum to do. 

It's strange the things that will strike you as normal and become a moment to treasure such as Cameron going to a wine tasting at a winery. Yep, he did that this week. Cameron wanting to leave our accommodation and get back to his own - he'd had dinner with us and he was done. We saw him a couple of times during his stay and he seemed happy to see us but also happy to get on and do his own thing. That tells me he is maturing and feeling more comfortable in his world without us. 

Cameron's normal life is not the mainstream idea of normal. But what is normal? We all walk to the beat of our own drum and lead our own individual lives within the world that surrounds us. Normal is whatever you make it. Some people like to conform and blend in but I don't think Cameron would have been one of those people. Even within the confines of the life he leads today he makes choices about the way he wants to connect with, and treat, others. He is an individual leading an extraordinary life which doesn't conform to societies idea of normal but it is his normal and we get to live in his normal with him.